Author Archives: David

Like I Said

01 Sunday Sep 2019

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It was in a recent post, (Favorites, 28 August 2019), I wrote about finding out what works for your life, then once discovered, not do those things that work.

My epiphany is not giving me much solace tonight. I’m tired. I’m lonely. J has some sort of upper respiratory complaint, so she is even more remote than usual. Dinner was simple, reheating some unfinished fettuccini from Carabba’s.

So I have to suck it up, get my self back on track. I want maximum results from as little exertion on my part as possible. Just like everybody else, I guess. But it doesn’t work that way. I need to get to back to purpose.

My Day

31 Saturday Aug 2019

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Frank Discussion Of Sexual Topics In Last Paragraphs.

Well I was up early. No surprise there. Then I went back to bed and slept til maybe 7:45. Then I went about doing stuff I had been planning on doing since Wednesday

I started with changing the sheets, taking the old ones off, putting new ones on, laundering the dirty sheets. That job is no big deal. Then came the set of tasks I said I would do Wednesday, shirts, khakis, and neckties to the cleaners, trousers to be hemmed and cuffed, haircut, purchase salmon for tonight, gasoline for the tank.

Mrs Trinh is a sweet Vietnamese lady who runs an alterations shop near the Thrift Shop operated by the Little Sisters Of The Poor. I don’t know how her prices compare with the alteration shop run by the dry cleaners, but I don’t care. I figure she’s gone through enough crap in her life so she has earned and deserves whatever she charges.

“Be ready next Friday.”

“Thank you, Mrs Trinh.”

Over to the laundry for the clothes. When I’m set up to iron again, I will iron my own shirts and khakis, but for now, Puritan Laundry & Dry Cleaners can do them.

Next stop: haircut. I wanted it short. My stylist and I discuss length. She cut the sides short, for that sidewall look. Then cut the top short with scissors, so I would have something to work with. Was nice

BJ’s came next. I just bought salmon for tonight, and some produce, bananas and mushrooms. I bought my gas there, regular unleaded at $2.189/gal.

During this going about, I realized I forgot the videos due back at the library. Once they were returned, I came home for good put the old mattress cover in the wash, took the clean sheets from the dryer, folded them and put them away.

J came home. I took a nap.

Dinner was poached salmon, a chopped tomato, cucumber and hearts of palm salad in Ken’s Steakhouse Greek Salad Dressing. Nice dinner, fairly light because the heat is creeping back in. Fresh fruit for dessert.

Now I am tired. However Bendita Tentacion, the Mexican lingerie store is on YouTube where the women are modeling the World’s Trashiest Lingerie and showing off some sex toys like vibrators, that look cheap too. (Note to self: learn Spanish). But I love these uninhibited women, having a good old time talking dildoes .

Me with haircut. Smiling this time.

#1 Son Update

30 Friday Aug 2019

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RB has been in hospital for nearly a week, recovering from pancreatitis. He had a CT scan yesterday which came back clear,

He wants to go home so he can cook ribs on the grill. Given his pancreatitis is related to his consumption of dietary fat, the ribs might have to be put on “HOLD” for a while.

My big life changes began at age 43, RB’s current age. He has already left a job that was killing him this year, between travel and stress. He is hurting now. But good things are happening.

0352 30 VIII 2019

30 Friday Aug 2019

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Is it insomnia when I don’t want to sleep? I went up early, lay down beside J while she watched whatever it was she watched, something about horrible things happening to people but with happy endings on TLC.

I came downstairs around 0300 to fix her tuna salad, pack her lunch. Then I wanted coffee, the real thing, no decaf. I made a pot.

My son is still in hospital, getting better, but his lipase is elevated, along with his bilirubin. He did walk around yesterday.

So I sit now. A freight train just passed through Ashland. It was a big one, going on forever.

Today I get a haircut, take shirts and trousers to be laundered, do the things I said I would do yesterday. There is a pair of trousers I bought in late winter I never bothered to have hemmed and cuffed. Today will be the day.

Amidst all the feelings I feel in early morning is a deep sadness about the state of the world. I think we have managed to “settle” for personal freedom, such as driving anywhere we want in a car, not being bound by “heteronormative, patriarchal standards” in directing our sexual behavior and relationships, or deciding when to end our lives. But is that freedom? Of course, at one level, it is.

Peggy Lee, the great American chanteuse, had a big hit in the 60’s, “Is That All There Is?“. I hear that refrain from time to time. Then I think of Job, the biblical character, who wondered why horrible things happened to him.

The fundamental human conceit is the notion that we have a right to know the answers to the mysteries of the universe. I am reminded of Icarus, the son of Daedalus, in Greek mythology. Daedalus had mastered flying by fashioning wings with feathers held in place by wax. Icarus used this mastery to fly too close to the sun, melting the wax, destroying his wings, sending him plunging into the sea.There should be no consequences for the effects of our curiosity, we declare.

I don’t know. Maybe I should just stick to getting my hair cut and my trousers hemmed. Now I am sleepy.

Catch-up

29 Thursday Aug 2019

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  1. I was exhausted today.
  2. #1 Son RB is still in hospital, getting over pancreatitis ia no small thing.
  3. The blessing in disguise is getting to know my daughter-in-law better.
  4. #2 Son is coming by on Labour Day.
  5. We found a thrift shop that will take the kitchen cabinet that fell off the wall in April 2018.

The Pile

29 Thursday Aug 2019

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This is what my contribution to recycling looked like this morning. That is roughly two rooms, with more to come.

I had to get up early to get this stuff out when Recycle Man gets here some time around 8:00 AM.

Because of my idiosyncratic sleep habits, I only slept a wee bit, like 3 hours, before I awoke, then stayed awake so I could put the junk at the curb. After that mission was accomplished, I went back to bed, slept two more hours, then got ready to go out with J, who had been running errands.

We had brunch, then went to the thrift shop, grocery store and farm stand. I put a brisket in the slow cooker, with a 7:00 PM finish time. Toward the end I put fresh corn in to roast. I sliced some primo Hanover tomatoes.

Dinner was good. Tomorrow’s lunch is ready for J. I am tired.

Favorites

28 Wednesday Aug 2019

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When I can swim, cook, read, write, sing, and fuck, it is an even more wonderful world than it already is. That kind of defines being human for me. Yeah, I should mention being in loving relationships, acknowledging the cosmic dimension of Christian Love, and treating all people with compassion and respect, especially when we disagree with them. But if I go into great lengths on that other stuff, I would be morphing this into some syllabus on being Mr. Perfect, which I don’t want to do.

Here is what I have done in life fairly consistently, I find the things that I enjoy doing, are beneficial for me to do, and nurture my soul at the deepest level. Then, once found, I avoid doing them, finding “more important” things to do. Finally when doing the “other stuff” to the neglect of the “important stuff” has wrought maximum unhappiness for my loved ones and me, I declare it is time to get back on track.

The “other stuff” leaves a debris field of dust, clutter, mess. As I clean, I see myself in the new clean, neat Dave Universe, functioning flawlessly. Cleaning accesses my fantasy world. The truth is imagining my self doing the things I enjoy is the first step in doing them.

Go figure.

The Home Office.

26 Monday Aug 2019

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I shifted my junk purging to the room J used as an office when she had her accounting practice. It was a hodge podge of paper, unfiled, disorganized work sheets. Just wretched. So I shredded about two big garbage bags full of papers, put all her professional books in one box. (She will never look at these again). Whether the information is still current is another question. But there they are. I might subdivide them to make them easier to carry out the house.

It was/is hard work. I fell asleep in my chair afterwards, before I even had time for a shower .

There is more to do. The pile to be recycled is substantial.

I will go back to the other bedroom tomorrow, and pare down my book collection (accumulation).