Human beings are pretty complex creatures. Factor in their sexual turn ons and it is a real labyrinth.

I like women, no surprise there, just based on probabilities, given that I am a male.

I am as binary as a light switch. Get it?

And I like women who wear make-up, but not like a tart. I like perfume, subtle but memorable. Shalimar, used to get me excited. Ex-wife #1 wore it. I like the scent of patchouli too. Chanel #5? My God, YES!

Clothes. When a woman sleeps in one of my old dress shirts, no panties, I will be excited, as in E-R-E-C-T. Wear a dress, ladies, and you can own me. Underwear is like the creme filling in a Hostess Twinkie©, always a welcome surprise. Dress like you want to be undressed.

Most importantly, stay awake. And act like I’m worth being with.