Today is a Wednesday. It is 0500. I have been up a little over an hour to see J off to work.

And I want to go back to bed, sleep another three hours. Having a dream with strong erotic content would be nice.

Loneliness seems permanent for me.

On YouTube now, I’m watching Nicola White of Tideline Art. She is my not-so-secret London crush. She is a “mudlarker”, that is, she hunts for little treasures in the tidal mud flats of the Thames. Her enthusiasm is delightful,

I should go to a meeting at 10:00, at the clubhouse near my home. Or I could sleep.

This need to cry that never comes is frustrating. Now I associate it with leaving this home and this marriage for a completely new adventure and relationship. It is, of course, fantasy, illusion.

The client files will spend another six months here. She wants to give them to her old colleague Gary, who is still in practice.

“Do one thing to move forward”, was a bit of advice I heard at a meeting the other day. I shall heed that advice.

So many of you I know as friends in this cyberworld. Is this my true home, my true village?

Later, Loves ❤