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There are two words when used together can strike fear in the heart of any aspiring cook. Those two words are “Pie Crust”. I had made crusts before and I have always found their preparation to be a daunting experience. My concern is that I will work the dough too much and the crust will be rubbery. This particular crust from The Joy of Cooking is a pate’ brisee, formulated to work with a quiche Lorraine, my dinner choice for last Thursday night. The recipe calls that I work flour into a chilled stick of butter and 3 tablespoons of lard, add water til a dough forms and let it rest chilled for 2 hours. All went well, until I started rolling out the chilled dough. Then my life became filled with questioning and self-doubt. Am I handling it too much? Bearing in mind that the chilled dough is only slightly more pliant than a radial tire, I begin rolling away ever so carefully with the rolling pin. It seemed to be getting thinner and thinner and pretty soon it fit inside the pie plate. It looks like I am good to go. I put in the bacon, then the cheese, and finally the milk/cream-egg mixture. Into the oven it goes and pretty soon, Bob’s your Uncle, a lovely quiche all golden brown, is ready for our enjoyment. It turned out quite tasty. Now here’s the irony. The yummy, custard-like, cheesy quiche more than concealed whatever shortcomings the crust may have had. It was certainly flaky, if you scraped off the filling to savor the crust. Then again, only a nosy mother-in-law of a newly-wed bride from a Fifties sitcom would be so anal as to do that.
Pie Crust Verdict: Pass.
Dispatches From Dystopia 
I love this. It has taken me a long time, decades, to master pie crust, but now I nail it every time. Remind me to give you my method. It’s fast and easy and works like a charm.
Sure. I’m open. Send away.
Finally, a few minutes to myself!
The pate brisee recipe in Joy of Cooking was my go-to for years. I use the 1975 edition, by the way. I perfected crust making using that recipe. But I always found it came up short, quantity-wise, for my lovely vintage 9-inch Pyrex glass pan. So a couple years ago, I went on a search for a better recipe.
And I found it. Even so, I tweaked it.
Overworking the dough is totally a thing. I don’t hand mix anymore, I use my large Cuisinart food processor that I inherited from my mom. Fast, easy, and the dough is not overworked. Predictable results every time. I no longer have anxiety attacks when making crust. Pie crust anxiety, also a thing.
I taught my former girlfriend, TB, how to make crust one epic day when we made four pies in a row. After that, she was never afraid to make pie crust again.
My current recipe is based on Martha Stewart’s pate brisee recipe for two 9-inch single crust pies or one 9-inch double crust (i.e., pie with a top, such as blueberry). I found that her recipe gave me too much dough, so I changed it slightly.
2-1/2 cups flour. I use King Arthur, always.
1 tsp salt
2 tsp sugar
2 sticks cold, unsalted butter, cut into pieces
1/2 cup iced water, iced enough to have a frozen skin on top.
Pulse flour, sugar, and salt in a food processor with standard blade, to combine. Add butter and process (not pulse) until mixture resembles coarse meal. With machine running, add ice water a tablespoon at a time until dough just starts to hold together. Switch back to pulsing and adding ice water a TEASPOON at a time until dough gathers into a ball. Remove dough from processor bowl and place it on a floured board. Form into a ball. Cut it in half. Form each half into a slightly flattened round, set one aside. Using flour generously above and below, roll out one round into a crust size. I use a French pastry roller because I’m a fancy butch. Use a dough scraper or large, thin flat spatula to lift the dough up from the board, and fold in half. Fold in half again. Place the point of the folded dough into the center of your pie plate, unfold, and shape to your pan, trimming off anything beyond a half inch over pan size. Fill bottom crust with already-prepared pie filling. Then roll out your second dough round the same way. Also fold in quarters to ease placement. Trim off excess and crimp. Cut vent slits in top. Bake according to pie instructions.
I never chill my dough rounds unless the air temp is over 90 degrees in my house. Using cold ingredients and working quickly preclude the need. If I’m making an uncovered pie, such as Dutch apple or a quiche, I save the second round, wrapped, in the fridge. If I am making quiche or other savory pie, I leave out the sugar and toss some thyme into the flour. If an uncovered, savory pie, I blind bake that crust.
Good luck and have fun!
Thanks. Actually looks like fun!
You’re welcome. Once you nail it, you’ll be like, “Damn, grrl!”
My latest challenge is learning how to make gluten-free pie crust that doesn’t suck. GQB has Celiac disease.
Good luck with that.
Right. KMN.
I’m still working on mine. My apple pies are a sight to behold but I cheat and use store made crust…. Shhh don’t tell anyone!
It’s OK. Your secret is safe with me.