The clean dishes have been put away. The dirty dishes are in the dishwasher. J is at work.

I need to eat. I feel strange, like I could cry, or go back to bed. There is tidying up to do while I watch YouTube videos.

When I say what I need to say to J she will react.

“I need you to hug me for no reason at all. “

I will leave it at that. For now.