Television has old guys like me believing that if we’re not watching, we’re missing something.

We grew up with this endless parade of stuff. The death of Lee Harvey Oswald, the moon landing, the Challenger explosion, Kennedy in Berlin, Reagan in Berlin, The Trump/ Clinton Debate, The Trump Assassination Attempt.

Get it?

Remember The Kinks song Celluloid Heroes.

Eyeballs on the screen is how the TV people make money.

I just watched a YouTube program about Lee Marvin . If he had a message, that message was being authentic. Be authentic to your self.

Believe in something. Live that belief

It’s deuce difficult.

I love women, absolutely adore them

I love sex with women.

I haven’t had sex since 2008, with a woman, not my wife.

I have not had sex with my wife since I don’t know when.

I‘m horny and lonely.

I want the intimacy that only sex with love can offer .

F*ck me.

Ten years ago, my ex-wife died

There is an empty place in my heart.

Grief cannot fill it.

I just hold this empty space, as if it were a hollow blue glass globe.

And if I drop it

And it shatters,

The loss will be complete

Shards of love

Shards of loss.

Let it stay unbroken

Fragile

At risk